What’s love Got to do with it?

Most parents love their children and try their best to show that love to them. In families, there are different ways to practice parenting children. Some systems define these parenting into three main ways: authoritative, authoritarian and permissive.

Authoritative parents connect with their children and show respect for their child’s feelings. When confronted with bad behavior, they focus on the reason for the behaviors – while still setting boundaries and expectations for the future. Parents are nurturing and involved.

Authoritarian parents put the emphasis on children following the rules and punishments when they don’t. These parents are “in charge” and children should “do as I say” without concern for discussions or explanations. These families tend to show less affection, are highly directive, and tend to have problems with power struggles as the children get older.

Permissive parenting is the opposite of authoritarian. These parents are focused on their children being happy at all times with little demands on their behavior or expectations for them.

As you may have guessed, research into these different styles supports the belief that authoritative parenting is the best style, with children showing the most positive outcomes as adults. These children tend to show greater emotional processing skills and expressiveness, less depressive symptoms, and healthier eating/lifestyle habits.

Of the other two, studies show that while still presenting outcomes with a greater risk of certain mental illnesses and other concerning behavior, children of permissive parents do fare better than those with authoritarian parents. The reason for that being that the children feel loved and respected.

Creating a home where children feel loved, connected, and valued has a powerful effect on their future happiness and success. As parents, we can learn and do better with our children. Most parents try to do better for their children than how they were raised, but it's not always easy.

At EMERGE, we talk with parents every day that are trying to learn new ways to address the children’s behaviors and change their behavior to better teach and guide them. It's important to remember that you are doing the best you can and it’s a positive step to make changes when you need to. And that in the end showing your child love and support is the most important part of the journey.

At EMERGE, we believe in “building connections to create peace in your home.” Reach out to set up a time to discuss your parenting style in more detail and how we can help.